Category: Let's talk
Earlier today I overheard some self pitying woman declare "I'll be paralysed and unable to do anything".
As you can imagine I was pissed off, at her negativity as I have been brought up to believe there is NO such word as cant...however I can understand where it comes from nevertheless in an age where disabled people are more prominent,and very successful {the british paralympic athletes brought home more gold medals,than the non disabled athletes} surely someone facing disability should be able to see light at the end of the tunnel.I think the problem lies with their perspective of disability,the word alone, conjours up so many negative connotations....
while being unavoidably subjected to her bleak monotone, I just felt like telling her not to be so pathetic, but in the end what good would it have done, none, I fear....I just wondered where will her perspective leave us? In our struggle for equality...
a while back someone posted a topic asking if people would not have a disability if they had the option, and some posted very strongly that they would choose not to, considering as the adjustments etc would be so great. well, becoming disabled is just as big an adjustment for someone who doesn't have one, not everyone rejoices at the fact they are going to be disabled.
Man I am aware of that but it is hardly in the same league as being told you have terminal cancer..and there are so many inovative therapy options now...people just see themselves as helpless victims and refuse to think of any other scenario...plus quite often, the medical profession are far from helpful,and very negative towards a condition ect, they cannot cure.
............................................................
I know there is every possibility of having a good quality of life, in spite of having a disability, also when you think as she did, you have allowed the condition ect to dictate your quality of life and that is too close to giving up...
possibly, but sometimes it's the initial reaction, after all, sometimes you can't imagine your life any different and when you're told it will change, then you are left with all sorts of questions, how will i do this... that ... the other ... and it's only with time that you gain acceptance.
Well, I think no one wants to become disabled and sometimes imagining it feels like the end of the road. Once the transition actually happens and you have to deal with it fortunately people find that in fact it's not that bad at all. And I think people just say these things mindlessly, they haven't studied what's availible to them because they don't want to think about what life would be like being disabled. It's a stupid comment of course but, well I understand where she's coming from on it in that she probably imagines life being way more dreadful than it actually would be if it were to happen.
Cheers
-B
That's what rehab is for they teach life skills and acceptance and educate the person to see that their life still has some meaning....
............................................................
it's the fear of the unknown and being seen as nothing more than an object of pity,however if the pity is in turn self inflicted, how else can the public be expected to react.
............................................................
I am aware that climbing, riding and off road driving, have a high risk rate, and the fear is always there, but I dont dewll on it, otherwise, I'd never scale anything...
I'm backing Sugar-baby on this one. I think dispairing at becoming paralysed is much more than fear of the unknown and narrow-mindedness. Acquiring a disability will mean a change of lifestyle, and, while she will learn there's a way to do almost everything, so much that she has always taken for granted will suddenly be taken away from her, and so much will have to be re-learned, that I'm not surprised she's taking some time adjusting. I think people who have had a disability all their lives, like me, tend to forget just what a different experience it must be having a disability dropped on you all of a sudden, when you're already somewhat set in your ways. Just my two cents, Erin.
If this woman wasn't disabled before I can understand how she might not like the news she has been given. If I was able-bodied, I'm sure I wouldn't want to be disabled, and the fact that I've been blind all my life makes me not want to be sighted. It'll save me the hastle of having to adapt.
Goblin, I think this is a very insensitive post. As many people here have already pointed out, you are neglecting the immense difference between *being* disabled, and *becoming* diabled. It might be okay to live with something that you already know, but for someone who is a new-comer to disability, I can't even imagine how hard and overwhelming that must be. So really, you're being a bit overly judgmental.
It is a bit annoying to me that you Goblin, base your whole concept of a person on something you overheard! As you stated Goblin, "Earlier today I overheard some self pitying woman declare 'I'll be paralysed and unable to do anything'". First of all, that is called intruding on someone else's privacy and private conversation, second since you just overheard only one sentence you have obviously missed the whole context of the topic and the full conversation between that woman and whomever she was talking to. Finally, as you know nothing at all about this woman and her life, I find it extremely stupid to go about criticizing something she said. You seem to call other people ignorant and stupid when they draw easy and fast conlussions on something they read or heard without digging a bit deeper to find out the truth. Unfortunately, it seems that you do exactly the same! Star
I just posted as I heard if it seems insensitive then I apologise. However as I said I have seen both sides and I know that a large part of the re-adjustment happens in the person's mind, if you develop a negative mindset, then your attitude will deteriorate to the point where you view yourself as incapable, I could hear that happening in this woman's voice and I could guess the outcome ....ok no one wants to be told you will be X.Y.Z in a few weeks or months,but this was just shockingly self pitying...